elgin street laundrette

 
i was going to tell you all about how good i felt, but i waited too long to update, apparently.

i was actually 95% myself for about three weeks (and the doctor said my lymph nodes had shrunk down to normal on friday), but i think i overdid it - by walking, of all the crazy things - and am now feeling kinda crappy again. the doc actually said, “don’t overdo it,” and i was thinking in my head that it was too late. stupid, stupid. but it’s so hard to know when to rest when you finally feel great after two solid months of not and don’t notice anything until after you’ve gone on a walk, for ONLY 15 MINUTES. sheesh.

my arthritis has been acting up in my left knee, too. it was so bad last night that none of my tricks (ice pack, painkillers, hour-long bath) worked. i told mr honey to replace me because i appear to be defective. (the knee is ok today.)

sorry to anyone who’s been trying to see me, but i’ve only had time to rest (no, seriously) and play catch-up when i’m not working on two big projects for work (besides my usual lot of work).

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mrs. t had her 69th birthday on sunday, and this time she managed to stay out of hospital. her 83-year-old housemate asked me for the second week in a row if i’d gained weight lately. i told him his question was completely inappropriate to ask any woman and that i don’t have a scale so i don’t keep track. he made an angry comment that i should because that’s the reason i’m not getting any modelling jobs. hmmm. as long as i feel ok and my pants zip up, i usually don’t care. i have grown a bit of a tummy from not being able to exercise and walk around, which is driving me crazy. but an 83-year-old man telling me i need to lose weight??? how weird.

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members of a certain religious organisation came to my apartment today. i told them very politely that i was home sick and didn’t feel up to talking to anyone (true), and they asked if there was anything they could do. i said “no, thank you”, and i soon heard them knocking on neighbours’ doors.

what is the best response in this situation, if you know enough about said religion to know it’s not for you? i don’t want to make up lies or just say something generic like “i’m not interested”, but i also don’t want to have a discussion about religion when i feel ill and have just woken up from a nap (also true). i know they must be used to much more abrupt responses than mine, and if it was a telemarketer - also uninvited - i’d have no problem hanging up. i really don’t want to offend, though, and i respect their beliefs. i wonder what their ideal version of “not interested” would be.

fairfield train station

 
my upstairs neighbor, kat, thinks the dog at the fairfield train station (see above) is creepy. i think it’s neat. in her defense, though, she says its eyes light up at night and turn red. yeah, i could see how that would be kinda spooky. it has speakers in its ears, from which - apparently - come train timetable information. i wonder who made it and where the idea came from.

i’ve been spending the last hour or so working on photos for 3RRR. i took similar photos of the same people this time last year, and it was one of the big experiences that pushed me toward getting a digital camera. for a cash-strapped organization in need of only a few pictures, film and processing just don’t make sense and are a hassle for both parties. i think today’s photos turned out ok - i hope they like them.

i’ve been asked to write an essay for the very cool fresno famous on what it would take for me to move back to fresno. i’ve always thought about it in the back of my mind but never seriously. there’s the obvious, like the lack of public transport, a vegetarian restaurant and an independent/arthouse cinema, but the other stuff is a bit harder to define. how strange to think fresno, which i’d always considered to stay exactly as is, could potentially change and that downtown is slowly being fixed up and populated.

for all the former fresnans reading this, what would it take to get you to move back (and parental illness or lack of money do not count - it has to be something fresno can change about itself)? and for all the current fresnans, please tell me why you *choose* to live there (family doesn’t count). maybe i’ll get some more ideas.

sherry’s birthday present is almost finished, thank goodness. too bad her birthday was in july. i am so horrible, and i have no idea if she’ll even like it. too late because my fingers went numb last night from working on it, and i’m not undoing it now!

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polyester just sent me a list of their top 50 albums of the past five years (how random, especially in august, no?). in case you’re wondering where polyester and i agree, wonder no more:
4. Cat Power - You Are Free
10. Machine Translations - Happy
14. The Magnetic Fields - 69 Love Songs
16. The Flaming Lips - Soft Bulletin
19. Architecture In Helsinki - Fingers Crossed
21. Art Of Fighting - Wires
24. The Flaming Lips - Yoshimi Battles The Pink Robots
27. The Avalanches - Since I Left You
29. Grandaddy - Sophtware Slump
37. The Strokes - Is This It
42. Grand Salvo - (1642 - 1727)

chinatown

 
on friday night i went with mr honey to the australian culture now exhibit at ngv and acmi. while he watched a sound performance, i had a wander. i walked into one room and saw a giant installation that immediately made a voice inside excitedly say, “donkey kong!” then i read the last sentence of the artist statement (scroll down) - what a load of crrrrap!

in my expert opinion, the description should really read, “this installation is about donkey kong.” or “i just wanted to see if i could recreate donkey kong.” the end. i hope he wrote it as a big f**k-you to the art world for making artists write statements in the first place, and it’s all a big joke after all. the only genuinely funny part, though, is that i couldn’t stop making donkey kong noises for the rest of the night.

james lynch’s art (and the idea behind his art) was my hands-down favorite. he made animations based on “dreams that his family and close friends have had in which he appears.” kind of like waking life but more interesting in its own way. i wish i had time to watch them all.

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i went to the doctor last week after two months of being sick. i wanted to touch base and make sure it wasn’t something like allergies (it’s not). she told me that the only thing she could think of in terms of a diagnosis was chronic fatigue, but that you have to have it for six months before you can be diagnosed. when i told her that i had it for six months during my freshman year of high school, she said that means i’m even more susceptible.

how funny that when i was originally diagnosed, fewer than half of doctors believed in it. now it has its own page on the centers for disease control website.

i had a long talk to my mom about it, and she advised me not to tell anyone at work because i haven’t really been diagnosed and the info could be used against me. instead of my lack of time and resources being a constant problem in terms of things not getting done, any illness could soon be to blame.

i’m trying to act like i know nothing and just focus on staying healthy, but hearing something like that really changes your perspective on things. One day of a sore throat and headache mean nothing when compared to something much more long-term. thank goodness i love sleep.